Friday, March 27, 2015

Dear Extroverts (Another Response Post)

You MUST read Opal’s letter to extroverts AND Aimee’s letter to introverts, because they are both valid and give you a feast for thought. They are also the reason I wrote this post, because my point is valid as well—and, as a bonus, told by Little Mermaid GIFs. 

(Ariel, if you were wondering, is me/introverts, and Eric is the Extrovert.)

Dearest Extroverts,

I love you people.

You’re talented, funny, charming, and all-around amazing folks, and in one way or another it’s true—I love you people.


To be fair, I hate you people too, but that is a temporary survival response and a natural (but rather unfortunate) side effect of being an introvert.

Sometimes I am incapable of greeting you or smiling at you in the halls. Sometimes I have not had access to my own bedroom for almost a week and I haven’t had a moment to myself in days (curse you, house guests). Sometimes I avoid you or ignore you or avoid eye contact or stumble over my words and it’s awkward.

Sorry.

I go crazy in my head when I am over-stimulated. That is okay. When you are by yourself and go crazy in your head from the lack of energy, that is okay, too. Sometimes it is necessary to forgive one another for the intrusions our brains make upon each other.


Sometimes you will be too loud and I will be too withdrawn and there will be a disconnect, and that is a fact of life.


Nonetheless, I love you people. We are just opposites, and that makes us perfect for each other!

I mean it. Yes, I need my alone time to recharge, but I like being with people, too. Specifically, I like being with people who make me like being with people. Lots of times, these people are extroverts. You.


Sometimes I need to talk, and other introverts can’t be there to listen. So I like that you draw me into conversation. You invite me to listen and to talk; you listen and talk in return. You listen to my ideas. You’re willing to exchange and edit viewpoints.

I like when you listen. I get hung up in my introverted mindset—what is the easiest way to do this without interacting with another human being? You convince me that sometimes further action is required.


Other times I need to be brave, or go crazy, or be in public. Not all introverts chicken out all the time like me, but if I bring an extrovert I have guaranteed moral support at my side.

I like that you let me loosen up. I’m uptight. Work always comes first. And I run myself into the ground. You deftly distract me. You remind me that there’s a time for laughter and there’s a time to just have fun for the fun of it, not for the express purpose of relaxation.


I like that you don’t leave me out. You make social situations easier and include me, and talk to me, even if it’s forced and hard, because you’re nice.

And it’s nice when you pay attention to me. I need people to pay attention to me sometimes. My family can walk in and out of the office all day and never say a word to me, which is fine, but it can feel neglecty sometimes, too.


When people share their time with me or aren’t scared to tell me that they love me, words just for me, that totally makes my day.


Seriously, you make my community FUN. You are ENERGETIC. You make yourselves pleasant to be with and you inflate our relationship so we can have the best of times together.


I meant what I said before. Extroverts, you complement introverts. I know, we’re not always the most fun people and we take a little extra maintenance, but you put up with us anyway. And we can understand each other’s needs—when extroverts claim that introverts are just “shy,” or an introvert associates loudness with stupidness, they are not being ideal extroverts or introverts. They are being uninformed. And sucky.


In reality, we get along well. You take our punches and you try to show us what revitalization means to you. You’re kind people. Caring people. And you fill in the blanks we introverts hold empty.


Believe me, you’ll run into some hates pretty soon. Speaking for myself, I will be grouchy and unforgiving and give you death glares until you retreat into some clandestine grave so that I may recover.

Sometimes I turn into an evil octopus. Sorry.
But I also need you guys, and you’re still there. So thanks for being you, extroverts. I love you people.


Sea ya later!


Heather

It's bad because I didn't use all the Little Mermaid GIFs I wanted to, and even though she is my favorite Disney princess I feel like I am getting a little too overboard. Anyway, who are some of the extroverts in your life? How do they make your life awesome? (I have two extroverted sisters, and they make my life a blast!)

24 comments :

  1. Great letter, Heather. It's can be easy to put labels on people, so a lot of times introverts can be seen as shy or snobby, and extroverts loud and pushy...but...that's not always the case. Introverts can be loud and fun and spontaneous. Just like extroverts can be quiet and thoughtful and great listeners. It's a bit more complex than we make it out to be!

    Like you said, we complement each other so well. I'm thankful for the extroverts in my life.

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    1. You're absolutely right; it's easy to judge people unfairly by what we expect of them or focus on in them, but that isn't fair to their true worth. :) Introverts and extroverts both have the power to surprise us, and that is what makes us work together so well! :D

      Also, yes—I'm certainly grateful for my extrovert friends and family as well. :)

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  2. Wow, that was a LOT of gifs. And I love that you say introverts complement extroverts, and vice versa -- I definitely never thought of it that way! I admit I'm personally sometimes guilty of associating loudness with stupidness, but I'm working on it. I don't really know many extroverts, I think ... but there are a few perfectly lovely people. And I've been mistaken for extroverts once or twice. :S

    I think I'll also write a response post of sorts -- with a twist. It's coming next week. *nods*

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    1. It was a lot of GIFs. I really wanted to use more but no. I have enough GIFs. But yes! I think sometimes MBTI work emphasizes the differences we have, rather than the fact that those differences are good. I also associate loudness with stupidness sometimes, but it takes practice to get out of that habit. People make a lot of assumptions about what it is to be an extrovert, but they aren't always fair or right.

      I look forward to reading the next response! I will try not to wear a hole in the carpet in the meantime. :)

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  3. First of all - I loveeee that you used Little Mermaid gifs because I have a soft spot for that movie deep down in my hard heart and I've been watching it a lot with the little sis lately and this made me happy. SO.
    But anyway, on to the actual point. I'm really, really glad you did this because it's not a blaming letter, but more of an appreciation letter, and it's positivity all around which is great. I love that you pointed out how we complement each other really well, because I think a lot of people (myself included) don't realize that most of the time and it's a good thing to remember. Like, like, like.

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    1. Ariel is my favorite princess, and I have a soft spot for all three of the movies. :D Hooray for TLM happiness!

      I'm glad you liked it—and I didn't want it to sound blamey, because I really do appreciate the extroverts in my life. :) It can definitely be hard to remember that we actually work really well supporting one another, and so this is as much a reminder for me as it is for you. Extroverts and introverts unite! :)

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  4. I'm actually the extrovert in my life. And though I do hang out with some other extroverts, most of my very best friends are introverts. We compliment each other nicely. I do a lot of the talking, but when they have something to say, I'll sit back and listen. I'm very thankful for the introverts in my life. :)

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    1. Well, congrats on being the extrovert, and I'm glad you have some awesome introvert friends as well. It's good you've managed to work out a system and do what works best for all! :) I'm sure your introvert friends must appreciate it, and they're thankful for you, too!

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  5. I think introverts and extroverts really do complement each other well. Sometimes it can get annoying when someone next to you is chatting really loudly and non stop when you are tired of conversation and just want to think about things, but other times, having extroverts around are really nice. I, too, love how they're so good at introducing themselves to new people, so they leave no one out. It's in human nature to get annoyed at other people sometimes, but that doesn't mean we can't work together.

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    1. And just to be clear, that is not meant to offend extroverts. I'm sure they get annoyed at us, too, sometimes, but the times when we actually work together far outweigh the times when we grate on each others' nerves.

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    2. Absolutely! I mean, I have plenty of times when I feel like I could strange people who are being insensitive to my introvert-needs, but you're right when you say that we are better together than we are alone. Which is something strange for an introvert to say, I suppose. XD We are awesome worker-togethers! :D

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  6. This is a brilliant letter! Thank you for responding :) And your gif use is awesome xD
    My sister is an extrovert, and so are four of my friends at school. They're fun, but I get tired of them very quickly and just want to curl up by myself. But we do complement each other- often I'm the one who reminds them to slow down and focus, but they keep me creative and exploring new things.

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    1. Thanks, I'm glad you liked it, and thanks for writing the first letter in the first place. :) (Also, TLM for life.)

      I know what it is to get tired of your extrovert friends, for sure, but like you said, we both serve each other's needs rather well! :) I especially like the example with your own friends; you both supplement the parts you might not have been able to fill by yourself.

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  7. As a(mild ) introvert who needs to spend time with her books as well as coping with other people, I agree with everything you say. My family also has a lot of house guests (as in, there are other people living in my house 80 % of the time) and it is very frustrating sometimes. I love meeting new people, and I am very talkative and believe in spontaneous cartwheels, but other people are exhausting, and when I'm frustrated, my snark appears and I say cruel things. Loved the gifs, Heather!

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    1. I'm glad you agree! I can't imagine having house guests 80% of the time! I go crazy after just a week with my relatives! It's good that you still love meeting new people but recognize that too much overstimulation can negatively impact you. I'm glad you liked the GIFs, and thanks for reading!

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  8. I love all the attention the differences between introverts and extraverts is getting these days. It's nice to know where the disconnect is. Makes it easier understand each other and get along.

    Proud introvert here. Grateful to understand myself and other people a little better.

    And thanks for stopping by my site, Heather. Great way to discover your blog. Hope to see you around.

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    1. It's definitely nice to see people understanding and celebrating their differences. I know that it definitely helps me get along with people sometimes. :)

      *high five* Being an introvert is awesome!

      And, of course. Thanks for commenting back! :)

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  9. I love this letter, and I can totally relate to your introvertedness (is that a word?) considering I'm an introvert, too.

    And you basically showed the entire Little Mermaid movie in just 14 GIFs XD

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    1. Well, I'm glad we're both on the same page, there. I was a little worried I was speaking too much on the behalf of introverts and extroverts everywhere.

      XD And that's interesting, since I used GIFs from all three movies, but thank you. :)

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  10. This post just gets better and better. :') but honestly, introverts need extroverts in our lives. I couldn't imagine having no extroverted friends; you're right about em complimenting introverts. On the other hand, its good to be with other introverts because they'll understand that sometimes you need to be alone, and there's no pressure to keep up a conversation with them.

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    1. Excuse my grammar and spelling, my tablet is quite bad on a blogger platform.

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    2. Yes, yes we do. Whether we like it all the time or not, we need that complimentary relationship and it's good to enjoy having all kinds of people in our friend base. Thanks for reading!

      (And yeah, technology, right? XD)

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  11. What a great post! Very insightful and well crafted, as well as humorous.

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    1. Glad you liked it. Thanks for reading! :)

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