Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Coping with Commenting (A Seven Point Post)

I kind of hate talking to people. I mean, the Internet makes it easier, but I will still freak out about emails I’ve sent sometimes and worry that I sound dumb and what if they email me back or what if they ignore it and sometimes that can be pretty stressful. It’s worse on blogs, because there’s a 85% chance that blogger is going to read and respond.

It's always nice to get comments, not to only have pix added in someone's favorites..... Thanks!
Flickr Credit: nolievr28

Commenting was the same way, but I have learned a few things—and it turns out that all it took was a little practice to make commenting easier.

These seven ideas work really well for me:

1. Actually Read the Post


Short comments aren’t bad, but if you can’t pull out a few details your comment sounds plastic and recyclable, which is sad since people want to know you read what they wrote.

2. Say What You Have to Say


Sometimes you may agree with the blogger—tell them. Other times you disagree—tell them. Maybe you have an anecdote to share on the topic—tell them. Or perhaps you can answer one of their questions—tell them. Don’t be afraid to share your thoughts and opinions, because bloggers love to hear them.

3. No One Expects You to Be Shakespeare


Fun fact: bloggers are people. Commenters are people. And yeah, use good grammar—but you don’t need to write an epic poem. You’re there for a relationship with the blogger, and I highly doubt anyone is tracking your comments for later publication (and if they are, run).

4. Be Respectful


Most of the time, someone else’s different opinion does not affect you—there’s no reason to be salty in your comment if you may be misunderstanding someone, or if they have a completely valid argument. Even if they don’t, you’re better off than being nice than being a jerk about whatever it is.

5. Check Back on Comments


You can actually have a conversation with comments. I did with Wild Horse about Fangirl, and Aimee about a book she carries. It was cool to have comments, but it was also cool to actually have a conversation, too!

6. Know When Not to Comment


You don’t have to comment on everything you read. You can come up with your own reasons, but sometimes if I’m uncomfortable or feel out of my league, on a professional blog or simply uninterested, I don’t pretend to be someone I’m not. I just go.

(This also applies if I can’t be nice or write with good intentions. If I am just mad, I let it go. Being cold never bothered me anyway.)

7. Enjoy Yourself


I don’t let myself read Youtube comments anymore because random people just type in stuff they believe about God or abortion or gay marriage or drugs and there’s like, no happiness or relevance. When you comment, ENJOY YOURSELF. Be happy. Add to the discussion. It’s your chance to participate in a community, so make the most of your opportunity!


Commenting is a lot easier now, for me, and something I enjoy a lot more than I once did. As my father says, practice makes better!

What are some of the things you do to write awesome comments? When do you decide to comment? Do you even comment at all? (Ha, if you don’t, I won’t know because YOU WON’T COMMENT hahaha)

~~~

BY THE WAY if you have any interest in guest posting for Fan Month, be sure to let me know on my contact form, so we can chat in an email!

ALSO Imogen Elvis recently shared another post about crafting perfect blog comments, so I thought I’d share it, because resources.

23 comments :

  1. Ugh, I suck at thinking of what to say for comments. (But apparently I'm also good at writing 500 word comments... *laughs nervously*)
    I've found that it really does help to pick something specific that you got out of the post, to show that you didn't just skim. And that might spark up a conversation, which is always fun!
    *awkwardly can't think of what else to say*

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    1. XD Hey, writing a long comment isn't the worst thing you could do! Being specific is good, absolutely, as is sparking conversations. Believe it or not, these comment things down here are supposed to help us communicate. :) *awkwardly ends comment*

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  2. I'm pretty new to blogging, so I tend to find it hard to comment on other blogs at times because I either don't know what to say, or I feel like everyone else has already said what I wanted to say. (That's why the 'like' button on WordPress is SO efficient!) Anyway, I totally agree on enjoying yourself when commenting. I hate it when someone deliberately starts an argument that results in everyone getting mad. Cool post!

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    1. *nods* I get it, and sometimes we all feel like that. I mean, Wordpress works well for some people, but when you put it like that, it almost bothers me just because pushing a 'like' button doesn't prove you've read anything, and it's a very passive role for someone to take. And obviously, people use the button wisely sometimes, but I don't know if that's a feature I'd willingly enjoy. Also, yes, arguments can be nasty—but we seem to move past them in the end. :) Thanks for reading!

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  3. Checking back on comments is one thing I struggle with. I'm going to be totally honest and admit that I don't always remember which posts I've commented on. But it's always nice when people come back to my blog and comment on it, so it's something I'm trying to do more of myself. I think short comments are my pet commenting peeve. When someone says 'nice post' and leaves it at that, as the blogger, how do you have a conversation with that? I always feel that they're just fishing for someone to come back to their blog instead of really engaging, though I'm sure that sometimes it's really that I just didn't write a post that connected with them and they wanted to be kind. Thanks so much for the shout out. You brought a smile to my face when I got to the end of your post.

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    1. Yeah, it can be hard, especially if you weren't super interested in the subject being posted on. We do all enjoy comments, though, so it's good you're working at it! I hate short comments too, but my general rule of thumb is I can spend about as much time on my reply as they did on their comment. *nods* And I agree, some people are just hunting for readers—but a lot of the most-read writers don't do that at all, so there's hope. :) And no problem! I was worried, at first, that I'd be redundant, but I decided to just add your find in anyway.

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  4. I was *going* to write this comment in verse, but I just couldn't. I'm so sorry.

    (5) is pretty much the thing I dislike most about Blogger. You aren't told when someone replies to your comments! I think there's a Wordpress plug-in that allows it. so *much weeping*

    Also, on Youtube comments, I read them all the time. So much hilarity there. (And fodder for my inner Grammar Nazi. *nods*)

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    1. Wow. I don't even know why you think you can come here. Do you even iambic pentameter?

      What? I get emailed every time someone comments on my blog. I will email you to see if I can help because seriously, at least on my end, it is a totally fixable thing.

      :O You are a braver woman than I. I just like, start to cry every time I scroll down.

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  5. I was *going* to write this comment in verse, but I just couldn't. I'm so sorry.

    (5) is pretty much the thing I dislike most about Blogger. You aren't told when someone replies to your comments! I think there's a Wordpress plug-in that allows it. so *much weeping*

    Also, on Youtube comments, I read them all the time. So much hilarity there. (And fodder for my inner Grammar Nazi. *nods*)

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  6. I love commenting on other blogs, and I can easily say that it's one of my favorite parts of the blogging process. I think the most important thing I've learned is that my comments don't have to be perfect. I enjoy every comment on my blog regardless of the length or what the commenter says (unless it's spammy or something along those lines), and I know other bloggers are like that, too. So I just try to relax and have fun with it.

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    1. It is fun to participate in the community, right? And I completely agree—we are all just human and we're here to be human on the Internet; blogging isn't a contest, so relaxing and having fun is a totally rational thing to do.

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  7. I'm really good at commenting on others, but I don't think that I'm good at replying.

    Most of the time, I'll read it and think "what now" because there's nothing to say in reply. I know that this can make the commenter feel unappreciated, though, which is why I always TRY to say something. But it can be hard.

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    1. Hm, that's a little something to think about. Usually I don't have that problem, just because a lot of comments are meant directly for me to read, and so I try to answer them like I'm writing a letter, or something. It can be hard, though, especially if you have an issue with the person who is commenting.

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  8. *headdesk*
    I just wrote a long comment, but it all got deleted. *huge sigh* Ookay, let me try to remember what I said. :p
    (Now I really have to 'cope' with the commenting...)

    I'm good with replying to comments on my own blog, but it's really hard for me to check back on the comments I make on other blogs. I wish there was a website that let me know when someone replied to the comment I made. It would make conversation so much more easier!
    And I agree with Aimme. Pull something special out of their post. I find it hard to reply to comments which basically just rephrased in a sentence in what I wrote in a post.

    *holds breath, hoping that this comment publishes*

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    1. :O I'm sorry. That happens to me all the time when people log out of my Google account and the blog doesn't reload with it. D:

      I know that Wordpress allows for comment subscribes, and somehow or another Cait at Paper Fury has some magic setting that sends me an email every time she replies to my comments! But you're right, it would make commenting easier—what I usually do, if I care, is follow the blog, and if the next time I happen upon a post, I stop by previous posts to see if the author's comment is something I want to reply to. Sometimes, it works. :)

      You did it! :D

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    2. *nods* I have a Wordpress account for commenting on other Wordpress blogs. There's an option that says 'Wordpress' when I comment on BlogSpot blogs, but I can never get it to work... I'll have to research that because it would be amazing if all my comments were hooked up with the Wordpress notifications.
      I get an email from Cait, too! I think she might have the option because her blog is self-hosted?

      Yay! *celebrates*

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    3. *laughs* I have the reverse problem! I wish that I could use my Wordpress account to link up with my blogspot blog, but apparently that is impossible. Plus it never lets you delete emails, so I have to use an obscure one to make it work. :P

      That could be something; I don't know much about self-hosting so I can't say. :P

      Thanks for checking back on your comment! :)

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  9. The whole Fangirl thing was so awesome. It was like the best comment-conversation I've ever had. The fact we didn't really agree made it better :)

    I never used to comment, I was way to scared to. But now, if I have something to say, and the post isn't to old, I just go for it. But I never say anything I wouldn't say to someone face to face. I very rarely comment on posts that are more than a week old.

    I find it quite off-putting when there are lots of comments on a post- I know it's harder for the author to get back to everyone. And it means scrolling alllll the way down, and then saying something thats probably already been voiced.

    If I would say it in a conversation, or I think it's interesting, I will write a comment. But if the comment is deleted, or says it can't/won't publish, I leave it. There's heaps of awesome stuff to read everyday, and sometimes writing comments and getting them published can be a real pain.

    But yay for comments because this one is very long xD

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    1. XD I agree with one correction: The fact that we didn't really agree without being buttfaces to each other made it better! (Because I do enjoy discussions where people disagree with me, I just hate it when people attack me the whole time and question my sanity, etc.)

      That's a good rule of thumb! I mean, I have a harder time thinking and talking at the same time, so maybe I wouldn't be able to say it very WELL to his or her face, but the gist is what counts. XD Although, I comment on posts more than a week old, just because I am not constrained by the human perceptions of time. *hair toss*

      That's true, too. I'm more inclined to write shorter comments, if at all, on bigger blogs, just because I feel like they won't be as interested in what I have to say when other people are writing novels in the comments...

      And that's also true—unless they are a person I like, I'm probably not going to cry over lost comments.

      Thanks for long commenting! Haha, it is great. :)

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  10. Great thoughts. I struggle with commenting too. Part of me wants to comment on every article and post I read that I love, just to let the writer know how much I appreciated the time they spend drafting something so helpful and enjoyable to me. The other part of me thinks I should only comment if I have some really valuable info or thoughts to add...which I usually don't.

    By the way, I use disqus on my blog. It allows people to comment and reply to comments. Whenever you are on any blog that uses the disqus comment system, you get a notification if someone replied to your comment and can easily respond without going all the way back to the post. It is perfect for me because it means I can have meaningful conversations in comments without having to remember which blogs I commented on already or returning to 30 blogs a day to see if I have gotten any replies. You might want to check it out!

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    1. I think we all feel like that sometimes, but as a blogger, I feel like that is completely irrelevant. I love hearing what people have to say, and people seem to underestimate the power of their own voices—even if you agree, you're going to say it differently.

      I've seen Disqus around; it works, but as for me I think I'm going to stay out of that particular consumer base for now. I have an account, I use it, but I'm just not convinced I'm ready for that. Thank you, though! :)

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  11. Awesome post! Sometimes, I do have trouble thinking of something to say that's relevant to the post or, like you said, I don't feel comfortable saying what I think of. But most of the time, I like commenting. It's fun to have conversations with people--from the safety of my bedroom, hiding behind my computer screen.


    Alexa S. Winters
    thessalexa.blogspot.com

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    1. Commenting has its ups and downs—it's great to have conversations (as you said, separately and alone in our houses because we're introverts!) but it can also be intimidating or unnecessary. Either way, it's still great! :D

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Check it out, comments and stuff. I love to hear from readers, and I always respond to commenters! Here's the fun part—if you leave a link to your blog I'll show up and comment back. I have just one rule down here: Don't Be a Problem. This spans the entire umbrella of rudeness and crudeness, so I reiterate: Don't Be a Problem. Thanks for stopping by!