Friday, January 3, 2014

Were My School Cool...



Christmas Break will be over soon. I’m disappointed, because I’m so much more productive when school isn’t in session. I watched the first two seasons of Game of Thrones with my parents in the few weeks we had off, I’m helping run a few writing events at my local library, I decided to write a novel and am on schedule to succeed, I got through the meager homework assigned to me, I had time to catch up with my friends, and have thus far read four or five books.

And despite the fact that I am really good at taking notes and enjoy things like history and Spanish, there are many times it does not feel entirely useful.

It makes me jealous of the students in fictional schools. Lesson plans are made purposefully, sometimes even dividing students by skill sets to ensure they’re going to kick butt in their future career. I can deal with the work. Work is fine by me. But it would be nice if I knew I’m going to use all my lessons someday.

Trust me, I can think of three schools I would rather attend immediately.

Photo Credit: Tim Arai on Flickr
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

As much as I love Calculus (not), learning to combat the wizarding world’s problems would prove a more interesting challenge. Though the school’s sorting system is seriously flawed—it literally sorts the world into good people and death eaters—the information would fascinate me and would have millions of practical applications. I don’t go home and start deriving all the equations I can think of, but I can think of a few people who could use some chore-relief.

Camp Half-Blood

Photo Credit: Kaitlin Kühn on Flickr
I’m nothing close to the ideal half-blood. I’m calm and I think things through, and in a fight I would probably
die. The lovely thing about CHB is its devotion to help teach kids how not to die, and provides an environment where kids learn to be themselves and adopt roles of leadership. It’s not exactly for everyone, but the point of going there is to hone useful skills to become strengths.

And besides, even if I’d be useless in a fight, I’ve always thought Mr. D a kindred spirit. I could hang out with him and drink soda and we’d have a lovely time despising each other.

For lack of a proper image of the island...
The Higher Institute of Villainous Education

I’d die to go here, really. Everything is important. It’s important to be stealthy and be financially aware and strong and capable. It’s the best place to learn to be an independent villain in your teenage years, and also teaches practical things. You learn to shoot right. You learn to sneak around and how to build things and think like a leader. You study important people and learn from their successes and mistakes. Most of all you’re encouraged to always be someone new and inventive. Think outside the box and then blow it up. That’s the coolest thing ever!


So aside from revealing a secret longing for my life to be in constant danger, there’s conclusive evidence that I do not find my current schoolwork productive or useful. And apparently watching Game of Thrones and learning how to shoot a gun are. Okay.

Back to my dreary school life.

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